Alice and Life

Things That I've learned as of lately...

2011-05-09T07:10:00.000-07:00

1. Desire Everything, Need Nothing!

2. We are three-dimensional beings: body, mind and spirit, and we should work towards expanding all three in this life.

3. Everything occurring in the Universe it’s occurring perfectly!

4. Give Everything, expect Nothing.

5. Nothing is ‘wrong’ there’s only that which it does not serve us well and that which helps us become who we truly are and want to be.

6. The Wrong one is the Right one to lead you to the Best one.

7. Our feelings are the ultimate truth. The first, instinctual reaction is the truth.

8. Everything happening in our lives is for our own good and it can serve us well.

9. Obedience is not the ultimate goal, it’s when the rules/the commandments become our own that we truly got it.

10. We are all ONE, what one feels and experiences we are all affected by it.

11. The best way to help someone is to help them see and experience who they really are and their full potential.

12. LOVE EVERYTHING.

13. Charity= the ability to make life more meaningful for others.

14. Truth leads to Obedience and that’s how we’re set free.

15. Anger is Fear announced. When we have no needs outside of ourselves, then nothing can make us angry, cause we don’t need anyone to treat us in a certain way.

16. Everything we do in life is either out of Love or out of Fear.

The Really Good News is: Jesus Has Overcome the World

2011-05-04T06:53:00.000-07:00

In John 16:33 Christ tells his disciples that in spite of the fact that the world will cause them great tribulations that they should be of good cheer for he has overcome the world.
I know that most focus on Jesus is centered on his suffering in Gethsemane, when crucified and at the Resurrection, all of which constitute the most glorious event of humanity, the Atonement.

But I think that before and in order for any of it to even be possible, Christ had to overcome the world!

And what does it mean to overcome the world? First, he had to be part mortal and human so that he would be prone to sin and temptation. Had it been any other way, then it would have been no great sacrifice nor conquer.

Second, Jesus wasn’t born all-learned and all-knowing, but through obedience, temperance, patience, love, hope and faith, he learned of his divine mission holding himself to that level.

And ultimately, he rose above all; in every instance he chose the highest way to deal with the situation. He didn’t make up excuses (even though he was also made of flesh), he didn’t allow the adversary to dictate his actions or thoughts (even though he was directly tempted by him).

I really don’t think it was any easier for him than it is for you and me to keep the commandments. If anything, it would have been a lot tougher because he was tempted a lot more intensely.

And yet, he had never given in, not once. Not a single bad thought about someone, not a single little gossip about somebody, not a moment of anger and loss of temper. After all, had any of these little slips occurred, the offering of him, as a sacrifice in our behalf would have not been acceptable anymore.

Because of all these implications I see Christ’s sacrifice as something beyond the last week of his life. His sacrifice had started at his birth, probably even before that, in the pre-mortal existence.

And I think that his constant commitment to being perfect for our sake is probably a greater sacrifice than even all the suffering and turmoil he’s gone through at the end.

But what empowered Christ to always choose right? What was the mental and spiritual place that he was coming from?

I think it all sprang out from a correct and deep understanding of his identity. I think he could overcome the world because he knew of the higher plan, of his relationship with the Father, of his relationship with us, and of the role he was to play in the whole plan.

I also don’t think that his ultimate goal was to solely be offered as a sacrifice for our sins and to live a perfect life, but I think his desire and hope is that by following his model we will also overcome the world.

He’s shown us how is done so that we can each attempt and even dare to try to overcome that which surrounds us. And although it is impossible, really, for you and me to succeed, on our own that is, he will compensate for the rest.

He wants us to become more and to be happier and the way to start is, just as he started it, to learn and experience our true identity. When we really understand who we are and who we can become, that’s when we become truly powerful, that’s when we dare to take the steps in overcoming the world.

YOU ARE ALREADY PERFECT!

2011-04-17T23:19:00.000-07:00

I am sure that many of you are familiar with Jesus Christ’s admonition/commandment of being perfect even as he and God are. Yet I have sensed often times that people stray away from this topic. They either obsess over being perfect, and never feel enough, or they try to avoid it altogether knowing that the target is impossible to reach. You actually get to hear quite often the line that ‘it’s impossible for us to become perfect in this life’. Yet, the scriptures also teach us that God will never ask anything of us that we would not be able to deliver, creating an apparent discrepancy between the two.

What if I told you that you are already Perfect?! What would that do for you, how would you view yourself and life around you if you believed and knew that you are perfect?

Before continuing with this argument, I want to share with you a relative new definition of Perfection that I have discovered, which helped see everything in a new light. I think each one of us, as with many other abstract concepts, we have a very different definition of it based on own experiences.

Perfection= to finish, to bring to an end, completeness
Further definitions of perfection, which come from various philosophers, Aristotle being one of them, are:

1. That which is complete – contains all the requisite parts
2. That which is so good that nothing of the kind could be better
3. That which has attained its purpose
4. One that possesses that of which by its nature is capable
5. That which is better to have than not to have
6. That which has allowed the fullness of the qualities possible for it
7. That which is the best

So if being perfect means you’re working towards something more and you make the best of what you’ve been given, still having more to attain, doesn’t it qualify you and me of being Perfect?

I think our error in thinking that perfection is unattainable in this life is seeing it as a final destination that once reached then we can stop. But perfection never stops, and we can reach different levels of perfection, this life being one of them.

And what’s best about understanding perfection in this way, it only encourages me to try even harder rather than getting too overwhelmed by the task that I would give up before even starting it.

Things are not as bad as we pretend they are

2011-04-10T22:39:00.000-07:00

One of the advantages of having been brought up in a foreign place is that it has offered me a unique perspective on life here in the United States of America.

I don’t know about you all, but reading the news daily it can become overwhelming considering both the volume and the nature of the stories. The predominant feeling being one of pessimism about the world in which we live, and a general acceptance of a doomed state we brought ourselves into without any possible way of escaping or improving it.

All the information I take in, it almost paralyzes me and for a second there I actually bite into it, feeling that there are no good or honest people left in our society. However, when I step back and look at the entire picture I quickly realize that the United States of America, and California for that matter, is having it really good. I realize that this system is still the most functional, that these politicians are still the most transparent and carrying towards the people. This is not just comparing it to other countries but also with other eras and civilizations.

The quality of life has never been this high; humanity has never had this much access to so much information and resources as we do today. We have just as much potential, if not even greater, that at any other time and place in history to succeed. Then how come the general attitude of both the media and its audience is that of an-ever-growing pessimism?

We shouldn’t allow anyone to dictate how we feel and how we perceive the world. It is in our own power to choose to appreciate life and what it has to offer, and to make the best of our circumstances.

That’s not to say that we shouldn’t try to improve where we’re at, progress is eternal so we’re not quite there yet, but we can do so with a positive outlook and seeing how much we already have.

No one has ever and will never profit from a negative approach or perspective on things, so why make our lives even tougher? The power is in our hands and no one can do it for us.

MARRIAGE – THE MIRACLE OF LIFE

2011-04-03T22:47:00.000-07:00

For the longest time, I considered bringing a newborn into the world the greatest miracle of life. I still consider this as a miracle and the power, which makes us more like our Heavenly Father. However, after pondering and after having some personal experiences, I have come to the conclusion that the greatest miracle in life is that of Marriage.

I can’t think of a better descriptive of marriage than that of a ‘miracle.’ Having two complete strangers, of different backgrounds, interests and many times from opposite sides of the world, come together and unite to each other, that to me constitutes the greatest miracle.

Considering how unnatural it actually is to commit and become one with someone who was once a complete stranger, it doesn’t surprise me the high divorce rates of today’s world. Many of them are even justified in choosing to go separate ways. For this reason what really surprises me is couples of years together, who are still committed to each other and who continue on and succeed in their marriage.

I am fascinated with the whole process of it. You go on a first date, many times with a complete stranger, if having been set up, then not even knowing what they look like. Then you try your hardest to read into each other, of course both putting their best self first. It’s almost like applying/interviewing for a job. And potentially, that same person can (and in the cases that end up in marriage) turn into the person by whom you will wake up for the rest of your life. That to me is magical!

Most people who are important and dear to us are usually blood-related, our spouses on the other hand, are not related to us; and I think this is by design, so that we would have to sacrifice and work hard into learning how to love them, up to the point that their happiness is more important to us than our own.

I believe that marriage is the process by which we become most like God. Although we each look for someone to marry who is the closest to our idea of perfection, I believe it is by design that none of us is perfect. Had we been perfect and lovable at all times it wouldn’t have been as high of a sacrifice to commit and stick with each other. Unfortunately this is the very reason for which many couples choose to separate, when in fact being imperfect beings gives us the opportunity of growing and becoming more Godly.

I find it fascinating how one can reach the level of identifying and defining who they are through their partner. It is as if the two have become one entity, this being independent of bringing forth offspring, that being a whole different process in and of itself.

The key to a successful marriage and the first step towards success is a proper knowledge and development of own character and self. I think it is imperative not only to know oneself but to also be content and at peace with own life. I believe that most misunderstandings and attacks in marriage come from insecurities and a lack of knowledge and understanding of own value and self worth.

The second step in ensuring a successful marriage is the selection process. You’d think that once one would know themselves well and their needs and wants that a proper selection will follow naturally and in most cases. That is not necessarily so. The secret to proper selection, I believe, is being patient. It is paying in the present the price for what you ultimately want.

I’ve seen too many who are rushing into marriage whether out of fear of never finding who they really want and would feel connected to, or wanting to satisfy certain needs in a timely manner. Having a short-sighted perspective is never a good idea when choosing anything in life, but specially when selecting your eternal companion.

I haven’t made too many mistakes in my life. That was until this last October, when I purchased a new car. Although my dream car is a Mercedes, not thinking (and really not being able to at the time) that I could afford it, I cut myself short and ended up purchasing a PT Cruiser. Doing so still got me excited, having a more spacious, new car. But this lasted for about two months, when I realized that my car didn’t really represent me. When I got my dream job I further realized that I could have afforded my dream car, had I waited a little longer.

I will probably end up losing a few couple thousand dollars in trying to get rid of the PT, imagine though the cost of rushing into marrying someone who is almost the person you want and would be happy with (the car still drove me around, after all…), yet not being and never being able to become the Mercedes.

When trying to find the optimum person with whom you’ll spend the rest of your life, in spite of what others may be saying, it is not a matter of being too picky or of thinking too highly of oneself. It is a matter of exercising faith and first bringing yourself to the level you imagine marriage needs to be, and then looking for the person who is at that same level, to whose life you can contribute and enhance. Anything less than this, I believe, would make one unhappy, and therefor not being able to contribute to the other person's life.

Remember, we cannot give someone something we don’t have ourselves.

Someone we don't need to Compete for attention

2010-11-24T13:56:00.000-08:00

I have recently come to the realization that at times it is very tiring to have to always prove ourselves. We have to do it when searching for jobs, when wanting to attract people into our lives, and even when dating.

Whether is your writing skills, or why someone should hang out with you, it seems like we're always advertising ourselves in a way. And maybe it's by design that it is like this, otherwise we would have let ourselves go and maybe would have not demanded as much from our own beings. However, sometimes it is simply exhausting.

Maybe I've been feeling it even more lately as I have been applying for jobs and interviewing. I'm tired of having to show off my skills and to convince people it is me who they want for that position.

But, along with these thoughts, another one came to me. I realized that the only being in the world (really, He is out of the world, but you get what I mean), to whom we don't have to prove anything to earn His love, is out Heavenly Father. It is so comforting to me to know that He actually knows me even better than I know myself, and that one, I cannot impress Him since He already knows all my thoughts and intentions, and that two, I wouldn't even have to prove anything to Him as His love is unconditional.

And it couldn't be any other way, as we would never really be worthy of His love. For that reason, and many others, I feel so grateful for His love and care for us. And maybe that's why He should be the center of our lives, and not work, friends and even family, as sooner or later things may change and then what would happen to our foundation? Crush probably, and with it ourselves too.

I should do this more often

2010-11-22T15:09:00.000-08:00

In my field of study, Public Relations that is, you always hear about WRITING as one of the main strengths of the profession.

Starting in college I noticed the great emphasis the professor placed on one's skills of writing well. I am slowly beginning to understand the importance of communicating clearly not just in a face-to-face situation, but probably even more importantly in writing. After all, writing is the most common way we communicate now days. Even when we are desk to desk with someone, most often we'd still send out an email rather than yell out what we need.

So what is exactly good writing? Is it the style of it? The tone? The grammar and syntax? Or maybe all of it...I don't know, I of course, have an opinion about it, as I do about everything else, but whether or not it's an accurate one that's a different story.

I believe that one's capacity of explaining in the least amount of words and in a clear manner their intention and needs is effective writing.

What I've noticed too, is that the more I wrote the easier it got to be and the more I've started to enjoy doing it. At first I was dreading it, specially that most professional writing needs to follow certain patterns and rules...however, even when I finished those documents I would still re-read them all over again, with a certain satisfaction.

I do write in my journal about once a week. And that I enjoy more because there are no rules there, although I kind of follow the same pattern most of the time. But then I realized that I can just blog more and hopefully improve my writing. I always feel like I have something worthwhile saying anyway...so I may as well share it with the world. All that unnecessary thinking that I do at no profit, I may as well put it to use somehow.

Anyway, so this may be the beginning of it. As you can see I am not committing to it yet, as far as how often or regular. I'm going through this phase of life that I'm trying to avoid having too many self-imposed rules and regulations, and for that reason I'm not promising it. That being said though, I am excited to embark in this journey, and to maybe discover a side of me that I haven't even known it's there.
We shall see.....

Why Nephi is so amazing...

2010-07-16T08:55:00.000-07:00

This morning I was reading 1 Nephi 4, and a few things occurred to me.

First of all, just as Lehi informed his sons of what the Lord has asked that they returned and got the records, Laman and Lemuel of course started murmuring. Nephi, knew right away that it was the Lord's request and not his father's. Then when they went into the city to get the records from Laban, Laman was almost killed, and I wonder if it didn't have to do with his negative attitude towards the whole task of getting the records.
Maybe it didn't though, because even Nephi's plan of trading all of their richness that they had previously left behind for the records didn't go through, as Laban took their goods and wanted to kill them.

However, the difference is that as the older brothers were ready to return to their father's, Nephi was persistent in completing the task. He exhorted them to return to the city and to act in faith. Murmuring they did follow him, and as he went into the city, he even stated that didn't know beforehand the things which will happen. And soon enough Laban was delivered into his hands, all weak and drunk.

Likewise, I feel like sometimes in our lives all the Lord wants to see from us is trying in faith, and even though our plan may not pan out, as Nephi's didn't either, He will eventually make it happen according to his will.

That gives me comfort, knowing that although I still need to try very hard and to the best of my abilities, that in the end He can and will make it happen, many times in miraculous ways.

And this is one of the many instances that I think Nephi is so amazing...

What is the role of a civilization?

2010-07-01T17:02:00.000-07:00

Today I read this quote

The essence of civilization is that the strong have a duty to protect the weak.
President G.W. Bush, March 2005

And it made me think, and that's always dangerous when i start thinking...
I actually believe that if a civilization/society is healthy and functional will form strong individuals, who of their own free will and choice will take care of the weak because they would have high values. However, as things have developed for the past few decades is that there is a lack of genuin interest of ensuring the survival and decent level of living of the weak. So what have we tried to do? To force the strong of taking care of the weak...and although this may seem as the optimum alternative on ensuring that the weak are taking care, I think even a better way of using our resources is to educate and empower the weak, only that would provide lasting, real results. That being said, of course there are special cases and that's not what I am talking about. I just think that too often in society we'd rather go for the quick fix, which in this case is to make the strong protect the weak, when instead we should treat the weak to their real potential and help them reach it.

2010-06-22T17:59:00.000-07:00

Hi,

It's been too long, I admit it. Even before sitting down right now, I was thinking whether or not I have the time to do this, but you know what, for some things it's worth making the time.
I have a few thoughts as a result of own recent experiences as well as talking with various friends. I have realized that being happy, although it is each and every person's goal ( whether they're conscious of it or not), that there is an art to reaching that state of being. It seems to me more clearly than ever, that one could have everything that they thought it would make them happy, and still feel unfulfilled, like there is still something missing. I venture to say that everyone of us has been in that situation at some point in our lives. So...my dilemma is, how come we are not feeling those ecstatic emotions that we anticipated feeling as a result of finishing up school, or getting that ideal job, or better yet, getting into that perfect relationship. What I experienced in my life is that even when I reached that one goal, instead of focusing and enjoying my accomplishment I would focus on what I was yet lacking...or perceived to be lacking. You know what this behavior leads to? I think it leads to feelings of worthlessness and inability of functioning to our full potential. Whose desire is it to make us work in a lower gear, or not run at all? Whose plan is to bring misery unto the humankind? You guessed right...that serpent, who is as old as the world is...Satan. I truly believe that one of the best tools satan is using against Heavenly Father's children is to make us feel like there's something missing, to make us yearn always for something better and higher, to make us want feelings and sensations that are not even real, nor leading to true happiness.
At first I thought that well, the reason I'm feeling off it's because I have good reasons, I don't have that great job that I've hoped for, or I didn't get into Law school like I thought it should have happened, and as those are good reasons to make me feel a little down or want to re-evaluate my life and make some decisions, I was not justified in feeling so low. But then I looked at some of my best friends, who I thought they have it all and that they surely should be completely happy. And you know what I found, that they also focused on what they were yet missing, or better yet, on what could possibly go wrong, how they could get cancer or what if something happened to their spouse. Yes, I also have those few friends who are always content with life, who have such a good energy and know their true value. I am so grateful for those examples in my life. They are a true example of discipleship, for how can we serve those around us when we are not in a good state ourselves.
Maybe some have been born with the ability to be happy naturally, but for those of us who seem to always need something more, I am certain that there is another way to live our lives. Emulating what those who are truly happy do and say is a good way to start. There seems to be a common character trait, that of true concern for others' wellbeing. Also that of asking for a lot but taking whatever one is given; of feeling in control of their emotions and reactions even when life is really tough.
I want to commit myself, that in spite of my circumstances I will always be grateful for what I do have, for my mind and testimony even if I have nothing else. I need to feel enough before I will accomplish all the great things I am attempting to, and only then will I have gotten the essence of it all.
See, I have it so well....in theory...the hard part is applying it. But i think we can help each other, specially that we're all going through it. I think that sincerely caring and complementing each other reminds us that we really should feel enough as we are.
Anyway, I could probably keep going on about this topic, because I care so much about not only me overcoming this mortal/satan-induced predicament, but it also pains me that most people out there are feeling the same way. It is all in our power to change our perspective and eventually have no outside sources influencing our spiritual and emotional state for the worst.

Feel free to add your opinions or comments on this. I'd be interested in your perspective and/or experiences.
Take care,
A.

Can ordering food be compared with dating?

2009-11-06T16:29:00.000-08:00

Not too long ago my brother and I, being really hungry went to Subway, he likes eating there, and he usually orders the Tuna sandwich, pretty boring if you asked me.
First of all one could fix that at home having the same final product or close enough, and then ordering the same thing each time.

So anyway, we were in line and each person in front of us who got to order took...I don't know maybe 4 minutes to order, and they would order the set menus, so pretty easy. My turn came up and...I started with the bread, picking a healthier one that what the person assumed I’d have, then I ordered the cheese, provolone, and then came the grilled chicken and some more toppings which I carefully picked. As a dressing I picked a combination of both vinaigrette and low fat ranch. Anyway, following me the line ended up being longer, because unlike the rest of the people I took at least twice the time to order. When I was finally done, asking carefully for just enough salt and pepper, my brother commented that I knew exactly what I wanted.

That's when it kind of hit me, I wasn't taking that much longer on purpose, nor was I trying to complicate the Subway person there...I simply knew exactly what I wanted and how I wanted it. If given the option, why not order exactly what I'm wishing for?!

Similarly to ordering food (and by the way, that was not an unique incident, I usually tend to take longer to order, not because I don't know what I want, but because I know it a little too well sometimes), I compared my behavior to dating. Is not like I like the fact that I am picky about guys, nor do I want to take longer to get one on purpose...I simply know exactly what I like, and since I am given the option of choosing, why rushing!!!

So the question comes...would it be easier or better for one not to know in detail what they want, whether it is in regards to their dinner or the person they'll marry?

I don't know, it may be...it would definitely save some time, as for me, though, that would not fly by. Given my personality, I am damned, one could say, to have high demands on the food I order as well as the guy I'm going to marry.

Teach For America personal letter

2009-11-04T14:57:00.000-08:00

Prior to compiling my personal letter for Teach for America I've done some online research, and some of the help I received was actually from individuals' blogs, where they either posted their own letters or shared their experience with the application process.
Today I was just informed that I was selected for a in-class interview, so I get to skip the phone interview, and I thought to return the favor to future Teach for America inquirers and post my own letter.
You should also know the questions they ask, which are:
* Why do you seek to join Teach For America?
* What would you hope to accomplish as a corps member?
* How would you determine your success as a corps member?

Here's my letter

To The Teach for America Selection Committee:

As a first generation immigrant to the United States and as the first college graduate in my family, I can attest to the importance of an education. I want to join Teach for America because I want to make a difference in the lives of the many children of our nation. With a diverse background, a passion for personal realization and a commitment to overcome the injustices in this world, I know I could succeed as a corps member.

Having been born and raised in Romania, and being 50 percent Roma (also known as Gypsies, an underprivileged segment of the population in Romania, who are strongly discriminated against), I learned early on in life that we are not born with equal opportunities, nor do we have equal access to resources. In spite of my scarce beginnings and due to encouraging, hard-working parents, I have been able to overcome many obstacles and pursue higher education in the United States. Improving the quality of teachers in this country is the most important ingredient in creating better students. As opposed to countries such as Romania, America has superior resources for creating an effective learning environment. For example the use of technology, quality textbooks and other materials provide instructors with the tools necessary to thrive. Teach for America is committed to producing quality teachers, a commitment which I would be privileged to help materialize.

As a corps member, I envision myself becoming not just a good teacher for my students, but also a source of direction, inspiration, and stability in a world that hasn’t been too responsive to their needs. Moving a person to action is probably one of the most difficult things to accomplish; moving 30 kids to action is even more difficult. However, as their instructor, I will take the time to get to know them individually, their weaknesses and strengths. I will praise them for their accomplishments and also help them turn their weaknesses into strengths by being patient and supportive. Outside of class I will continue working with the students’ families and seek ways to help them connect the classroom materials with the outside world. I know that it takes hard work, perseverance and mutual respect to succeed in this world, and I intend to emphasize these and other positive characteristics in the classroom.

The measure of my success in the classroom will be both an improved academic performance, as well as a development of personal character. True success will especially be measured in the years to come and in the choices my students will be making. I would hope that as a result of our interaction, my students would choose to be honest and hard-working individuals, who are committed to success.

I look forward to hearing back from you, and to further discussing how I can contribute to the Teach for America team and make a difference in the lives of children.

Family Traditions

2009-10-16T11:24:00.000-07:00

I am finally getting it. I've never quite understood what's going on with all these families who are trying to follow certain patterns every Christmas, Easter, Thanks Giving Day and any other occasions they find fit to follow a family tradition. I thought they did so to give them a sense of comfort and of predictability, two of some of the basic human needs.
Ironically enough, what has helped me actually get the whole tradition thing it's the Vampires Diaries....yes indeed, and although I am Romanian and Transilvania is part of Romania, this has nothing to do with that. Vampire Diaries is a TV show, I'm not even sure on what channel, which caught both my brother David and my attention about three weeks ago. We both agreed on watching that first episode all the way (we normally argue what channel to watch, he wants his MTV cribs shows, and I usually demand the news station). We both ended up liking the show, and because it ends on a climax each time, we were anticipating watching the show the following week.
Following Thursday, without even mentioning the intent of watching the show again, around 8pm David was in front of the TV letting me know the show was starting.
Now, maybe that doesn't sound like a lot, I mean any typical 15-year-old may react just like that, but knowing my brother, he is more aloof and wants to do his own thing, and since I have been gone out of the house for some time now (and the fact that I'm 10 yrs older than him), we don't have many things that we do together.
Third week of watching the show, it hit me! We have actually developed a family tradition of watching the Vampires Diaries every Thursday night. And as much as I dislike wasting time watching TV, I realized the greater thing which is behind watching the show. My brother and I are bonding...it has become our thing that we do together. This is more important to me than anything else I could be doing during that hour.
I know this is not the best example of a family tradition, but through this experience I got a little bit of the vision of what family traditions can do for us. I am committed to set my own family traditions when the time will come. I am not sure if one should sit down and decide what they should do periodically or if we should experience different activities and based on how much the family has enjoyed it to decide on making it a tradition.

my thoughts on Parenting (A religion paper i wrote)

2008-11-20T10:33:00.000-08:00

Although parenting is one of the most important things in the society, many parents are doing a poor job at raising their children. In talking about creating successful homes, Elder James E. Faust mentioned a few ways that parents may achieve this, parents must set the example, disciplining children, teaching children to work, helping children internalize values, and a most important one, a thousand threads of love.
Based on the mentioned ways to achieve a successful home, it is not difficult for one to see the lack of most these ways in today's society. I like the mentioning of work as a main way to create a successful home. I can personally attest to the importance of it. Growing up I didn't do a lot of work around the house, my mother would ask me help her cook sometimes, but that was usually only around the holydays. Also, in Romania teenagers don't have jobs, so I didn't start working until I moved to the U.S. when I was 18. I started to experience more independence as I had a job, but even more importantly it gave the confidence and trust that I could accomplish things on my own.
The parental example is the most important tool in teaching children. I doubt that most parents understand this great responsibility. In the reading, it was mentioned the importance of not being hypocritical when it comes to teaching children, because they can see through it and it would only turn them off towards applying the rule in their own life. Through obedience to the gospel of Jesus Christ we can easily avoid this. Just as Christ has never taught anything he hasn't lived, we can follow the example.
One of my personal theories that aids in creating a successful home is the attitude parents have toward their children. Many parents have their own set of baggage and agenda, and not being completely satisfied with themselves and who they've become, they take it upon their children. Too many parents are abusing their authority and even stewardship in demanding their children's obedience more for the sake of exercising poser over them, than out of true concern for their welfare. Many times adults underestimate the power and mental capacity children have, even in their early stages of life. Respecting them from early on would build their self-esteem and strengthen their desire to do what's right. Even in later stages of development parents may cross boundaries. I think in order to overcome this challenge parents must learn how to let their children be their own individuals, even if it means they will make mistakes along the way. I consider this capacity of allowing children be and develop as they need one of the greatest acts of love. It takes complete altruism as well as exercising faith in the Lord.
Applying the above-mentioned concept to our relationship with God, the way He expresses His love is by letting us become whom we choose to become. Ironically enough many today go as far as to stop believing in a higher power claiming that have we had a creator/father in heaven, none of the harmful things would happen to the good people in the world.
Just having a child does not qualify one as a good parent. Living the gospel fully will allow one to be a better parent.

2008-11-13T09:44:00.000-08:00

Hello,

Yesterday i read these articles for my Marriage Prep class. This is a religion class here at BYU. The topic of the articles was the role of the mothers of staying at home. Growing up in Romania, although i've been a member of the LDS church since i was 9, i don't recall the women int he church being encouraged to stay at home when they have kids. The main reason for this not being the focus of the church in Romania is the tougher economical situation people have over there. Mothers don't really have the option of staying home if they want their family to have the basics. For this reason growing up my mother has always had a full time job. I remember yearning to spend more time with her. I remember coming home from school and not having her there, it was lonely...however, since everyone else was in the same situation, i thought it was the norm, so i wasn't too sad about it.

So growing up with in such an environment of working mothers, i've always assumed that even if i were to stay at home right after having my children, that i would a few years later to back to work. Being encouraged by my parents to focus on a career, and having them almost belittling women in the church that are staying home moms, i developed the attitude of must have a career and be independent.

After reading those few articles yesterday and after talking to others, i realized i will have to choose raising my children in the right way over developing a career. I used to think that i could manage both, but the truth is that i couldn't do both full time. I also used to think that i would sacrifice some of my time spent with them for being able to afford better and more things...If we're honest about it though, there is no substitute for time spent with the children. Specially in early stages of life.

So, as a result of my pondering upon this matter, i've made up my mind that not only i will be a staying-home mom, but i want to be one, and i will enjoy it.

That's not to say that because i'm planning on staying home i will not pursue my education. I want to have a Law degree, and i believe it will only make me a better individual and mother.

2008-11-05T09:26:00.000-08:00

The day after elections

2008-11-05T08:59:00.000-08:00

What i think of the last night's elections results is that first and foremost they are historical. This is not too difficult to recognize for obvious reasons. I don't consider myself of any party per se, and as the elections continued i was actually getting more away from Obama than towards him. However, when he was announced as the 44th president of the great country of the United States of America, it felt ... right. He is not perfect by any means, just as all mortals are not, but i feel hopeful he'll do well.

I think good times are awaiting the American people, and not having been born

in this Nation to begin with, i feel honored to be a part of these crucial times when

history is created.

I would hope that regardless of their political preferences, the American people

will be willing to start all fresh and to sustain and support the new president. Will

this mean they shouldn't criticize Obama and his political agenda? No, as a matter of

fact i find that to be their duty, that of staying informed and express their opinions.

What i don't find necessary and actually even destructive is pointless criticism and

focusing on all negative....nothing constructive come from that. I also don't appreciate

those that they mostly criticize rather than give alternatives or coming with constructive

ideas.

Anyways...these are my thoughts of the elections, i am sure the political turmoil

will not be ending with the electoral results, and i am looking forward to monitor

and crate my own take on what's going on.

Alice A.

MY very own Blog....

2008-11-04T18:39:00.000-08:00

This is my first posting...i can already tell this is the beginning of an interesting journey.